Parenting from Scratch

We had our last homebirth class this week, and it was the “reunion” class, where homebirth families who have already had their babies come back and tell their birth stories.  First, it was fun to see all of these babies-a couple of them were even from our class (which, due to holidays, “icy” nights, and a bathroom renovation, was stretched out over more than eight weeks).  But what really amazed me was the variety in the different birth stories.  Of course I never expected them to all be the same, but it’s kind of amazing to hear firsthand birth story after birth story.  I’ve been working hard at trying to keep my expectations about our birth pretty vague-I don’t want to set myself up for frustration or disappointment by expecting one type of birth and having another.  And going to class this week really helped with that, I think. 

There was one woman who requested to be transferred to the hospital, because she was so exhausted.  She hadn’t slept much for days and would hardly eat or drink a thing.  She got some rest at the hospital and was able to push out her healthy baby after being in labor for a day and a half or so.  Then, there was another woman-she seemed quite a bit younger than I am-who was herself “caught” by our instructor, Mary.  She apparently had the most serene birth Mary’s ever seen-and Mary’s been practicing as a midwife for over 30 years!  The woman’s mother and sister came to class, too, and said over and over how there was a complete absence of fear in this woman, she just really went with the flow of the birth process.  Some of the births went really fast, some really slow.  One woman gave birth to her fourth child (second at home) and was surprised at how slow it went-all three of her other births had gone quickly.  She said that what really helped her was to visualize exactly what her uterus was doing to get the baby out, and allowing herself to relax around her uterus to let it do its job.  Once she was able to do that, things progressed much more quickly.  One of our classmates lives in an apartment complex.  And, not terribly surprisingly, her neighbors downstairs thought her husband was murdering her or something and called the police.  Her husband said he wished he’d had a video camera to film the look on the officer’s face when he told him his wife was having a baby in the living room (and when he cracked the door a little wider so the officer could see he wasn’t kidding).  There were actually quite a few more families there, but these were the ones that stuck with me the most.   

It was great to get to hear all of these stories from these beautiful women with their beautiful babies.  So much goes into the planning and preparation for a homebirth that I think a lot of folks don’t realize.  A major part of it for me has been the emotional and psychological side of it.  Hearing from all of these women and knowing that, despite the differences in the details of their labors, they all had healthy, happy babies in the end makes me all the more confident that Trevor and I have made the right choice for how we want to bring our baby into the world.  And it makes me look forward to giving birth that much more-even though there’s no way to know for sure how long or short, how painful, and how calm or excited our birth will be.  It’s just hard to believe that in a matter of weeks, we’ll have a baby to hold and a story to remember.

I had my first dream about breastfeeding last night, and today seems like the right time to finally write this post about breastfeeding I’ve been cooking up for forever.  In the dream, I wasn’t having trouble with the mechanics of breastfeeding; I just kept falling asleep and forgetting to feed the baby for hours at a time.  A touch of anxiety, perhaps? 

A quick disclaimer: this post is about breastfeeding, which seems to have lots of weight and differing opinions surrounding it.  I’m not making any attempt at some major opinion on the subject, just reflecting on my current thoughts and feelings—as someone who has never breastfed (not even as an infantile recipient) but who will be in a matter of weeks.  It has been my experience that oftentimes, when confronted with plans, beliefs, or decisions that are different from our own, we often view those perspectives as calling to challenge our own.  This is not what I’m about, and that’s not what this post is about. 

As my due date gets closer and closer (like six weeks, folks!), I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and reading about breastfeeding.  At first, I had this assumption that there wasn’t much to consider about it—that it would just happen naturally and we’d go from there.  But then I witnessed someone having contractions for the first time in my life at our homebirth class last week (where we were, incidentally, learning about breastfeeding).  I’m not sure if these were Braxton-Hicks contractions or the real deal, but it later struck me as totally nuts that I’d never seen a woman have a contraction before.  I was only two and a half years old when my one biological sibling was born, so I certainly don’t remember seeing my mother in labor.  By the time I moved in with my aunt, uncle, and cousins, my aunt had already had all of her children.  And for various reasons, I have never been around my cousin-sisters when they’ve been in labor.  In a way, I’ve been sheltered from witnessing the birth experience and my own will be my very first.  This is by no means unusual in our culture, and I’m not really surprised, but I am a little saddened by it.  I imagine, though, that in many other cultures I would most certainly seen at least one woman in labor (probably even deliver) by the ripe age of almost 28.    

In a sense, the same goes for breastfeeding (I know, you weren’t sure if I was going to get back to boobs or not).  Sure, I’ve seen women, including those in my family, breastfeed both in public and in private spaces.  But I haven’t really SEEN them.  Many use blankets or cover-ups, making it totally impossible to see what’s going on.  And even those who do not use any cover are generally discreet enough that to truly witness breastfeeding would involve quite a bit of staring and neck-craning—not typically welcomed, or at least that’s how I imagine it.  Again, in other places in the world, I probably would have grown up seeing women breastfeed up close enough to be able to have confidence that I would know exactly how to do it when the time comes.  I would never have needed to attend a class on breastfeeding, because I would have had years’ worth of seeing it for myself.  Again, that’s fine, and I’m not wishing to be from somewhere else.  I read a blog post on Stand and Deliver about how more public breastfeeding could really help our culture in several ways, and I think she’s onto something.  And here’s a post considering some of the reasons breastfeeding is so unsupported in the United States.    

I find it interesting, too, that I’m much more worried about my ability to breastfeed without issues than in my ability to give birth.  Since way before I became pregnant, I’ve been 100 percent confident in my body’s inherent ability to give birth.  And I used to feel that way about breastfeeding.  But when I read about some of the problems that can disrupt breastfeeding, when I hear about friends having difficulty establishing or maintaining breastfeeding (for whatever reason and to whatever result), and when I have to go to a class to learn the “best” way to start breastfeeding, I realize that, although the desire and intention to breastfeed is inherent in me, the true instinct for actually doing so might not be.  Childbirth is not a learned activity, but breastfeeding is—and it comes with a learning curve. 

That’s not to say that I am not confident that I, ultimately, WILL be able to breastfeed.  I’m just trying to say that I’m learning to adjust my expectations about what that process—getting over the hump of the learning curve—will be like.  And a little adjustment never hurt anyone.  So, if you’re thinking of posting a comment telling me not to worry, I ask you to please not do that.  I think it’s quite fair of me to worry, and I’d rather be real here. 

I DO have plans.  I plan to breastfeed for at least one year, with the expectation that I will continue to breastfeed some beyond that.  How far beyond?  I don’t know…we’ll see when I get there.  My reasons: I firmly believe in all of the health benefits breastfeeding offers both my baby and myself; I greatly look forward to having that bond with my baby (one I didn’t have with my own mother—not that I’m reading too much into that); and I will do my best to never pay for formula when I can make breast milk for free, especially in THIS economy.  There are a number of variables that could impact this plan, and possibly for the worse.  But I’m a planner, and I feel good about this plan.   

 I’ll leave you with these few things that didn’t quite fit into this little breastfeeding essay, but that I wanted to share:

·         I hadn’t given much thought to it before, but after having a conversation with a friend who breastfed, I’ve wondered how I’m going to feel about my breasts as a sexual fixture (TMI?  Too late!) while I’m breastfeeding.  Maybe I’ll be fine with seeing them as serving both functions, but maybe not.  In fact, I even went so far as to ask Trevor how he’s going to feel about “sharing” my breasts with the baby, or even having to relinquish his “stake” in them temporarily.  Fortunately, he’s a good sport, and said he’ll be fine with whatever I need.  We’re called mammals for a reason…and it has nothing to do with foreplay. 

·         Here’s an interesting article from the New York Post about breast milk and milk that has been expressed for bottle feeding.  I’m not sure how I feel about this article.  I’m planning on pumping when I go back to work, because it’s the only way I could possibly continue to breastfeed at all after my maternity leave.  Sure, if we were in the financial position where I did not have to go back to work, I might not find the need for a pump, but it’s the best plan I can come up with.  I’d much prefer to feed my baby expressed breast milk than formula any day, if those are my choices. 

·         And this blog post is about Salma Hayek “cross-nursing” a sick baby in Sierre Leone.  Tres controversial.  I don’t have too much of an opinion on her particular decision—maybe I’d have done the same in that situation.  My book club and I had a discussion sort of about this a while back when we read a book containing a passage where one lactating mother swoops up her friend’s crying baby (in the prolonged absence of the baby’s mother and with nary a bottle in sight) and begins to breastfeed it in a restaurant.  Lots of interesting issues come out of this scenario.  Would I do it?  Probably not, but mostly owing (I assume—I’m not even lactating yet, so I guess I can’t really know at this point) to my fear that my friend would freak out like the mother in the book did when she returned.  Would I cross-nurse a friend’s baby if, for whatever good reason, she asked me to?  Possibly.  Would I be okay if a friend did it with my baby?  I think it would depend on the circumstances.  A healthy friend who I know takes care of herself and her own baby?  Possibly.  In a situation in which my baby is screaming bloody murder and I’ve been careless to forget a bottle (of expressed breast milk of my own)?  Possibly.  Just for kicks?  Um, probably not.  Do I think it’s too much different from sisters or close friends providing expressed breast milk to each other because one is having difficulties with supply?  I’m not sure.  But possibly not.  All interesting shades of gray here, for me.     

According to this Chinese Lunar Calendar table, I’m having a boy, not a girl.  All I’m saying is, if we do have a boy, be prepared for delays in the name decision.  I strongly suspect that we’ll go into labor without having made a real decision on a boy’s name. 

Boy or girl, Baby Edwards will be born in the year of the Ox.  I was born in the year of the Rooster, and Trevor was born in the year of the Boar (uh, pig…just saying).

Crossing my fingers I don’t end up with a situation like this:

more animals

Well, the family so far.  Don’t worry, we haven’t had the baby yet (thank goodness)!  I just thought it might be fun to show off the family we’ve created over the last few years.  I promise, I’ll only do this once.  Probably.

Trevor Seth

Here’s Trevor.  You’ve already seen some pictures of him, but here he is again.  He’s a bike mechanic and the Arkansas Mountain Bike Championship Series first place winner in 2008 for the beginner class, ages 19-29 (so proud).  He’s a great husband and a lot of fun to hang out with.  He does the dishes, the laundry, most of the yard work, the cats’ litter boxes, and lots of other things that probabaly go under-appreciated most of the time.  He’s great with kids (one of the reasons I wanted to make a life partner out of him), and he’s going to be the most fun dad.  He thinks you all should ride bikes (I asked him if he had a message to “the readers”).

Tarzan

This is Tarzan.  He was the first pet Trevor and I adopted together.  We got him from a girl I grew up with who was moving and could only take one cat with her.  He’s a lover…probably the most affectionate cat alive.  He is a little obsessive-compulsive–he has to have his food bowl emptied and refilled several times a day, or he yells at us (I’m really not kidding or making it up); he’ll spend 10 minutes in the little box scooping all of the litter over to one side; and he’s relentless about getting in your lap (he’s doing it right now).  I think he’s going to love Baby Edwards, we just hope he doesn’t love it too much!

Nari

This is Nari.  We got her from the Humane Society when we lived in Batesville.  She’s such a happy dog!  She’s really leggy, so she’s quite fast.  She “talks” a ton!  I’m not sure I’ve met a dog that talks as much as she does.  She’s most talkative in the morning when it’s time to go out and when it’s time for her food.  I used to do agility with her, and she really liked it.  We might go back to it sometime after the baby is born.  She’s a little skiddish, so we’re going to have to monitor her a little extra with the baby.  I don’t think we’re going to have to have any major problems or anything, I just think it’s going to take her a little while to get used to the baby.

Junebug

This is Junebug.  We adopted her on Trevor’s birthday last year by accident.  We went to PetSmart to get Tarzan some cat treats, and we came out with a whole cat!  We were immediately captivated by her.  She was a little less interested in us, at least for a while.  It took her about six months or so to really warm up to us, but now she chases us around, grabbing our hands with her paw and putting it on her head to be petted (she’s quite smart).  She’s freaking hilarious sometimes.  She watches TV–and even sits under the TV waiting on us to turn it on sometimes.  She loves chasing Willow (up next) and getting Willow to chase her around the house.  We almost lost her last spring to feline hepatic lipidosis, an experience that showed us just how much we love our pets and how far we’re willing to go to take care of them. Junebug’s not going to be too fussed about the baby, I think.  She’s been surprisingly patient with all of the kids we’ve had over, even when they were poking her and she could have totally swiped their faces (which is what she would have done to one of the dogs!).  Our kid will be just another set of hands to pet her (well, once it’s big enough).

Willow

And last, but not least, is Willow.  We adopted her from CARE last January, also by accident.  I’d been volunteering with them for a while, and I wanted to try fostering.  We’d tried to foster one dog, but she wanted to eat our cats, and we couldn’t have that.  When I met Willow to see if I was alright with trying her out as a foster, I fell in love with her right away.  Five minutes later, I called Trevor to warn him that we were probably adopting yet another pet.  Willow is a teddy bear!  She’s so playful and so friendly, she’s going to be the best dog a kid could ask for.  She’s been great with all of the kids we’ve had her around.  She makes this hilarious noise whenever something is perplexing her (Junebug, the neighborhood dog that runs ar0und, whatever); I can just imagine her following Baby Edwards around making her little noise, trying to get some attention.

So that’s it!  In a two-bedroom, one-bathroom house!  Some people think we’re totally nuts having this many animals, especially with a baby on the way.  But they really make our house a home and make us even more of a family already.  I think pets are an outstanding way for children to learn empathy, responsiblity, and joy; and I think ours will do just the trick.

Warning: I’m kind of going to complain a bit in this post.  Maybe a lot.

Right now, while I’m sitting at my computer desk (now in the dining room–we’re making room for baby in the “second bedroom,” which is now officially known as the “baby’s room”), every deepish breath I take is met with a twinge of pain on part of my right ribcage.  Or is it the right part of my ribcage–I’m never sure, do we talk about them as if they’re a pair, or two halves of a one?  Whatever.  I am totally running out of room in here!  The baby (we’re at 31 weeks now!) is about 3.5 pounds, meaning that it’s going to be gaining half a pound a week to get up to a healthy birth weight.  Where the heck is all that baby going to go???   I’m starting to think I might have the shortest torso ever.  My boobs and my belly–they’re practically fighting over what little space is left.  I’ve been having such trouble with the underwire in my bras, that I broke down and bought a maternity bra and think I’m going to wear it the rest of my life.  And back to my right ribcage (or right side), there’s this almost constant tingling going on.  I think the baby’s butt is pressing on a nerve or something.  I get these weird pains in weird places all the time.   I was getting out of the car tonight, and I had shooting pains in my thighs.  This morning, I woke up with such a pain in my kneecap, I was whimpering in pain.  Oh, and not to mention the DOUBLE Charlie horses I got at 4:45 Thursday morning–as in both calves were paralyzed in excruciating pain at exactly the same time.  My back is in pretty much constant pain, the only time it doesn’t hurt is when I’m in bed.  I can’t wear my wedding ring anymore, and my “substitute” ring is almost too small already.  When I take my socks off, I’ve got this obscene indentation on the top of my shins from the swelling.  I’m going to post a picture of that, once I shave my legs…I mean if I shave my legs (hey, it’s kind of difficult to do and totally hard to be motivated).  I’m short of breath a lot, mostly when I’m relaxing on the couch, which seems weird.

Okay.  That WAS a lot.  So now I’m going to make up for it.  At least a little.

We’re super excited about the baby coming soon.  Even when we’re sort of freaking out about it.  Nesting is fun.  My hair–it’s kind of fabulous.  It’s long, and I hardly shed a strand, so it’s super thick, and I’m loving it.  I LOVE getting to feel the baby move all the time (I’m trying to catch it on video so I can post it, but I think the baby is camera-shy).  I thought it was going to be freaky and bother me, but I can already imagine how much I’m going to miss it.  Other than all of the above complaints, I feel just great.  In fact, overall, I’m pretty pleased with the way things have been going with the pregnancy.  Really pleased, actually.  Mostly because I know it could be a lot worse.  I’m healthy, and my baby’s healthy.  We’re going to have a healthy, happy baby, and we’re going to do our darndest to keep it healthy and happy.  For those of you who know us and our pets, if how much we love our pets is any indication of how loved this baby is going to be (and already is), you know this is going to be one loved little being.  We’ve got great support from family and friends, and I’m not nearly as scared about a lot of things that I could be.  And, I’ve got Trevor to do all of this with!  He’s going to be such a great dad, and I know he’s going to make it even more fun to raise this child together.

Okay, so I wrote more lines in the “woes” than “wows” section, but I think the “wows” are more impactful and important, so they carry more weight.

To all the moms (new or experienced): I know, I’m a little on the whiney side, but I really feel like I’ve been pretty good about the complaining.  To all the potential moms: I hope this isn’t scary, but there are a lot of things that don’t get talked about when it comes to pregnancy, and some of them are not so fun.  I’m just keeping it real here.  To any misters out there: go give a pregnant woman or a mother a big high-five, because you’ll never have to go through all of this.  But that also means you’ll never GET to go through all of it, either.

Horray!  The missing post has been discovered!  Thank you Becca and/or Tara–I’m not sure which of you left the comment, but you win the gold star for finding it!

SO, here is a post that is a little less than accurate (as in, we’re not on vacation anymore), but still might be worth a read…

As you are reading this, Trevor and I are on our last pre-baby trip to visit his family in Telford, Tennessee.

Happy New Year, everybody!  Is it totally sad that we spent our last pre-baby New Year’s Eve in a car?  Maybe, but that’s just how things worked out.  I’m obviously writing this post ahead of time, so I’ll save the trip stories for when we get back.

As I write this, I’m dealing with  my first sickness during pregnancy.  Trevor caught a cold a few days after Christmas and was kind enough to give it to me.  Funny thing is that I normally am the one passing a cold on to him.  And, I usually get sick on my first day of vacation, as opposed to my last.  I’ve had to miss more work than I had planned on, but I guess this is the best time of the year to do so.  Having a cold while you’re pregnant pretty much sucks.  There’s just not a whole lot that I can do about it.  I don’t normally take too much medicine for a cold–I mean, it’s not like it’s going to be cured by anything anyway–but some Claritin or something might be nice.  I did get a neti pot, though the verdict is still out on how much that’s helping.  My midwife suggested adding grapefruit seed extract, but I’ve held off sending Trevor out for any of that, because it’s the sort of thing that would frustrate him to have to track down.  I’m trying to get more fluids down, but that can be hard when you’re making trips to the bathroom after every few sips.  Baby Edwards seems to be taking the cold in stride.  Plenty of movement going on, but nothing that seems like complaining.

We’ve had a good holiday season so far.  Christmas was spent with my family, with several get-togethers of varying sizes.  We were given the crib bedding we wanted, as well as the matching blanket and lamp.  Our resolutions this New Year (well, for the few weeks after we get back from TN) include finishing the coffee table and painting a book shelf (I’ll handle picking the colors, Trevor will manage the fumey stuff), moving my favorite-for-sentimental-reasons couch out of the dining room (and, subsequently, the house), moving the office stuff into the dining room in as attractive a way possible, putting the baby’s room together, having the carpet in our bedroom cleaned, getting the crib set up in our room, and rearranging the pets’ sleeping spots to accommodate the crib.  You know, among other things…

Something else we’ll be working on is getting the animals ready for the sounds the baby will be making.  We played some YouTube videos of crying babies for them the other day, and that was pretty interesting.  Nari got a little nervous at first, but settled down fairly quickly.  Willow seemed concerned and did her piggy-whiney thing, but also calmed down before long.  Junebug tried to turn off the laptop, I think–she’s pretty technologically advanced for a cat.  And Tarzan, oh Tarzan…he took it out on the other animals.  He bit Junebug on the neck, and then went on to try to bite Willow, too.  I suppose he thought perhaps it was one of them making all the noise.  Needless to say, we’ll be playing these videos every once in a while, to try to help them become accustomed to the sounds.  Not sure how much it will pay off in the end, but it’s worth a shot.

Wow.  We are counting down the weeks now!  I’m 29 weeks and 3 days or so.  In just about 7 weeks (ghasp!), the baby could be born and not be considered “preterm,” and I can deliver at home.  In just 11 weeks, I’ll be right about at my due date.  And in lucky 13 weeks, if the baby hasn’t come out yet, I’m going to be one miserable momma.  Even 13 weeks seems like nothing at this point.  Like it could be tomorrow.

There’s just so much to do!  Trevor and I made a room-by-room list of things that we need/want to do before the baby comes.  I’d ideally like to have everything pretty much wrapped up by 36 weeks.  Stuff like having the fence gate moved, having the carpet in our bedroom professionally cleaned, ordering and setting up the crib, reorganizing the bathroom storage, reorganizing some things in the kitchen, moving the office stuff out into the dining room, etc.  The list is way longer than that.

One thing I have started doing is working on desensitizing the pets to the sounds of a baby crying.  There are actually CDs you can purchase for such a process, but I’ve found that YouTube is pretty effective.  In fact, I’m doing it right now.  I’ve got three of the four in the bedroom with me, and I just keep playing clips of crying babies.  This is probably the third time I’ve done this, and I’m already seeing improvements.  At first Tarzan was a little spooked, but now he’s laying to my left on the bed; Willow is to my right on the bed, totally not fussed a bit by all of the racket; and Nari is on her bed on the floor, occasionally interested, but not overly worried.  Okay, well, Tarzan is now standing on the baby belly, meowing in my face…but that’s actually pretty normal for him.

I had an appointment with my midwife, Kim, this afternoon.  Everything is looking great.  I’ve gained about 10 or 12 pounds so far (sort of a guesstimate, because I really wasn’t sure what I weighed before I got pregnant).  My blood pressure is super, which is always good news.  AND, the best news of all is that the baby is in a nice, head-down position.  When Trevor and I were in Tennessee*, the baby was being super shy for the first two days (much to the disappointment of the aunts-to-be).  Then, on Saturday–when Trevor’s sisters weren’t around, of course–the baby moved almost constantly all day long. It was unbelievable.  It moved a lot on Sunday, too, but had sort of calmed down by Monday.  I’m guessing that all that moving was Baby Edwards trying to find a good, comfortable spot to chill in for a while.  So here’s hoping that the spawn stays put.  For the most part, at least.  Kim was able to feel that the head is down, that the baby is facing to my left, that the bulging pressure I’ve been feeling in the upper right part of my belly is the baby’s butt, and that the movements off to the upper left are the feet.  It sort of amazes me how much it all makes sense now.  It was also pretty cool that she was able to go right to the heartbeat this time–other times it’s been like a hunting game.  I’ll be going for appointments with Kim every other week now, rather than once a month.  That’s pretty cool, because it’ll make the time seem to fly by even faster (wait, wasn’t I just complaining that there wasn’t enough time?…I’m just excited that Baby Edwards will be here to meet us all soon.  On the other hand, that’s a good bit of sick time being used up, as well as more time spent in the car going too and from Conway.  Totally worth it.

*I just now realized that the post I wrote that should have been published while I was on our trip totally disappeared!  As in, didn’t just not get posted, but is not in my saved drafts or anyting at all.  I’m really kind of angry about it.  I can hardly remember what it was about, but I DO remember that I was up until 11:00 or something, while I was sick (stupid, I know), getting it written.  Dangit!

Baked goods!!!

This morning, my work friend, Cade, was sooo kind to bring me some Mickey’s chocolate cake.  It was delicious!  He and his wife have two daughters, so they know the ropes when it comes to pregnancy.  That, and Cade and I have a common love for all things Mickey’s!  Problem is, it’s totally started a major craving for cake.  I’ve been pretty freaking healthy with this pregnancy (well, as far as food goes–I have GOT to get back to attempting exercise), and I’m a little surprised with how strongly I’m craving cake.  I stumbled across this blog, Bakerella, and now all I can think about are cupcakes!  Perhaps this weekend I’ll mosey over to Cupcakes on Kavanaugh and get a few (dozen).  OR, I could make some peanut butter cupcakes to go with the leftover chocolate ganache frosting I have in the freezer.  Then again, maybe you know of someone who just happens to want to make some cupcakes for this little pregnant lady.

I had my second appointment with our midwife yesterday, and it went really well.  It’s nice to have so much time with her so we can really get to know each other.  Yesterday, she had the pleasure of getting the entire scoop on my life story.  Trevor didn’t get to go with me this time, because the appointment had been rescheduled from Wednesday because of a birth, and he’d already switched his day off.  Kim wasn’t able to find the baby’s heartbeat, which isn’t such a big deal, since I’ve already heard it.   She assured me there’s nothing to worry about–it’s still in there.  I worried a little this morning, but the cake set me straight.  I weighed in and have only gained two pounds in the last five weeks or so (see, told you I’ve been eating healthy).

As a totally weird side-note that you probably don’t want to know: I seem to have a hairy baby belly developing.  I don’t know if it’s the prenatal vitamins or what, but my belly sure is looking hairier than I remember.  It’s not something I check for regularly, but I noticed it today.  Past-preggers out there–did this happen to you?  Did you just ignore it?  Shave it?  It’s kinda gross, and I don’t like it!

I think there’s light at the end of the tunnel for the general discomforts of the first trimester.  Sure, my stomach still almost never feels normal, and I’d rather sleep longer than spend time conditioning my hair (or showering, for that matter).  But there’s a glimmering ray of hope: the weekends.  For whatever reason–increased amount of sleep, flexible schedule, lack of computer desk–weekends seem to be great for me and my body, and I now look forward to them more than ever before, which is saying a lot.  Everyone always says that the second trimester is the best.  I hope they’re right, because the previous one wasn’t so great.  I think some of it has to do with just getting used to things.  Like the increased blood volume: not a problem anymore.  I’ve gotten used to it.  I’ve also gotten used to sleeping in a sports bra, something I never thought I’d do.

We were supposed to see our midwife this afternoon, but she had a birth to attend, so I’m rescheduled for tomorrow.  Unfortunately, that means I’m going solo, because Trevor already switched his day off from Tuesday to Wednesday so he could go with me today.  It’ll be fine, I just want Trevor to get to be as involved as possible in this whole process (and I know he wants that, too).  Plus, it’s a lonely drive to and from Conway, though I know it like the back of my hand.

And here’s a call for advice from those of you out there who have already done this whole pregnancy thing: how on earth did you get the recommended amount of protein?  I haven’t been doing any counting, but I think it’s a safe bet that I don’t get 60 grams every day.  I’ve been adding more meat to my mostly-beans-and-dairy list of protein sources, but that hasn’t been as easy as I would like.  I’m even eating roasted almonds for a snack at work, even though they make me want to gag.  And those are just 7 grams of protein per serving (which means I get even less since I can’t make it through 28 almonds).  Bah!

Oh, and I’m seriously going to start the baby belly pics soon.  I was going to do it last Sunday, but it slipped away.  I guess I’m showing now, so you won’t be just looking at my pre-conception beer belly (that got me accused of being pregnant on several occasions in the last two years–something else I just need to get over, already).

As an aside: is everyone else just loving this fallish weather we’ve been having?  We’ve been sleeping with the windows open, and I’m fantasizing about Halloween (any ideas on costumes for a preggo?) and Thanksgiving.  Hello candy and turkey!